19 May 2024

The importance of finding purpose and fulfillment in life for mental well-being. Experiences with ketamine therapy and personal growth, The significance of aligning one’s actions with their passions and values. Explores how prioritizing purpose over materialistic goals can lead to greater happiness and reduced stress, encouraging viewers to identify their strengths and contribute positively to society.

Highlights of the Podcast

00:51 – What do you love about your job?

02:21 – The world looks at health care

03:14 – The goal setting

04:53 – The same idea with body

07:35 – The things that are important

10:19- It changes the way you look at the world

12:03 – All this access to throw money into to all sorts of great things

13:24 – A fantastic mom and a fantastic dad is 100% of purpose

14:36 – A social channel

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:00:04] So we’re keeping on with Mental Health Week because it’s Mental Health Month. We’re going to talk a little about, purpose of that. The reason that I wanted to make can go into this one is what we’ve seen happen when we go through ketamine therapy or psilocybin therapy. Specifically ketamine, because we do it so much more. Is like I had I’ve had people do this, like, 2 or 3 guys calling. One of my buddies who went through ketamine called me. It was like, oh, my anger is gone. And I was like, well, that’s great. It’s fantastic. And he’s like, no, I don’t know. That’s what drove me to, you know, some of these people tell me I couldn’t do something, so I get mad, I would go do it. And so like that is like, now that’s kind of gone. He’s like, what do I do now? And I said, well, that’s easy. You know, you replace your anger with love. What do you love about your job? What do you love helping people do? What is it that you know, when you you know, when you close a deal or you do something and someone comes back and says, man, thanks for x, y, z. Like what part of that do you love the most? Like, it’s not the money part.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:01:05] What is it? And and we kind of walk through it and he’s like cool. So we just turned it around and it’s like, find the thing you love about what you do and do more of that, because at the end of the day, you’ll enjoy doing it more and you’ll do it better because the more you like something, the better you’re able to do it. So, that kind of gets into purpose. And, we talk a lot about because I work with a lot of people that stress lots of CEOs, lots of business guys, and burnout to think I can. That’s one of the things that people always worry about. And people ask me all the time, they’re like, all right, so I hear you get up at 4:00 in the morning and you read research for two hours, and you come to the office and you work and you go gym, and you come home and you go back to the office work, and then you’re on your you’re doing stuff at home. How do you work so much? And I get burnt out. Well, you get burnt out by grinding against your purpose. This is the health thing, is who I am. It’s what I do. It’s what interests me. It’s my hobby. I read, I read for couple of reasons. I read one because, now it’s the point where if I don’t do it, I realize nobody else is. And so if we want people to get help, this is my purpose. My purpose is to share this information. Help change the way that the world looks at health care.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:02:22] Hopefully people will share their videos with their friends or their friends can get help as well. That’s kind of what I do. That’s my thing. That’s what gives me hope and fun and I like I love learning this stuff. I love sharing, that’s my purpose. And so I will continue to do it because I love it when you can find the thing that you do that you can get paid for, that you love. That’s that’s where things really start taking off. And, you know, it’s funny because people ask on my circle, like who I like. I like the guys who are in love with who they do. Like, you find me an Hvac guy or a plumber or a welder or like my my my pastor at, Saint Andrews. These are. That’s who they are. Like, if you’re like, well, we’re not going to pay you anymore. Be like, great, I’ll go get another job. Eat what? I’m going to do this because I love like that’s that’s the type of thing. So if you can find it a way to make that your life, that’s the way to do it. And I can see the goal setting, I guess, you know, finding your purpose. But that’s kind of where a lot of things are. What we see today in society is that, you know, we get very, very stuck on materialistic function. You know, I have to have a, you know, I have a $60,000 car now. I want the $80,000 car, I have the $80,000 car and I want a $100,000 car. I have the 2000 square foot house, but I really want a 5000 square foot house. And they get the five now on a 6000 square foot house on what, two more garages? So it’s that type of thing that keeps us driving to, well, now I’ve got to go to work. That my favorite meme is the, is the one that says a Mercedes is. Or you can use a Porsche or Ferrari or whatever, but, you know, it’s a Mercedes isn’t a flex if you have to drive it to the job you hate.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:03:58] So that’s kind of what it is. I think that’s where a lot of when we start talking about mental health, you know, there’s a lot of biochemical stuff that we got to get right. But there’s a lot of purpose and drive and you know, that’s everything we gotta get. We gotta get set as well. And you know, so when we start going through some of these things, we start figuring out what is it that you that you really enjoy, what is really going on? What we found is that it’s it’s not necessarily, for instance, money, because actually, to tell you the truth, know about it. Very, very few people actually want money. They one of the things money, brains because they assume that they’re going to happiness from it. And like I said, they’re like, well, I’ll step up my car and then that will bring me status and that’ll bring me, you know, enjoyment and I’ll bring x, y, z. And they do and they feel great for, you know, two, three weeks because they’re expecting to, you know, things to change. And they don’t. And so they’re like well all right. And then like, well maybe it’s this or maybe it’s that. So, you know, it’s the same idea with body is more if you, you know, say, well, you know, if I had you know, better this or better that or bigger boobs or better nose or whatever and they get those things fixed. And then the world doesn’t change. And because that wasn’t the issue. And so people start to kind of fall into this rut of, you know, everything’s helpless.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:05:12] Because they’re looking at it from the wrong direction. But if you can kind of figure out what it is that you do that you love to do, that helps, you know, people around you can makes the world better, that you’re, you know, naturally a little bit give to that and lean into that. That’s that’s where a lot of this stuff lives. We’ve worked with lots and lots of people that have taken, you know, decreases in pay, but it’s radically increase their quality of life. Because they kind of shifted their priorities. And that’s been that’s been really, really fine for a mental health week for your mental health area because we’ll get people in and we’ll start talking to them and we’ll go over their stress. We’ll go over all their issues. And and a lot of times it’s, you know, my family’s pretty good. My kids are good. You know, my my husband, wife, my partner is pretty good, you know. But most of my, my stress comes from my job as well. What do you do? And, you know, we’ll go through it and like, is there anything that you really like about your job? Lots of guys have left opiate field specifically, have left the field, started their own consulting businesses and done really, really well because now they got to do the way they wanted to do it, and they got to take advantage of all the, 1099 stuff. And so they, they and that ended up when you learn how to do 1099, you know, whatever you’re making now, if you do 1099, you’re making more like $100,000 a year, as W-2 is a lot less than $100,000 a year tonight.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:06:44] And I, and as soon as you do that, you’re like, oh, now I see how this works. There’s a different level of stress, but now you’re doing the thing. You enjoy the way you want to do it. So I just take it personally on the purpose thing. I was doing my purpose to a degree, and was trying to do a bunch of other things. And then, we when I did my DMT, and this is a very common thing when we talk about psychedelics, specifically when we talk about DMT. Aaron Rodgers talks about it. I’ve spoken about a couple of times. I have a bunch of my neurology buddies and watch my, high end CEO guys who have done who’ve gone through the process that we go through with the intake and have come back out on the other side and like, it was the greatest thing I’ve ever done. They’re like the things I thought were important that aren’t. I don’t care about all the things that are important, like I’m laser focused on. And that’s kind of what happened to me. So after I did it, I realized that I was and I was lukewarm. This gets into a larger conversation. I was lukewarm on what I was doing, and I needed to, you know, turn it up. And that’s when the bodybuilding thing happened. That’s when the fasting started. That’s when everything that I’ve, I’ve known to do, but I just wasn’t doing, I started doing, and that’s really where we kind of see, like, this is how things have to be.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:08:04] I don’t care, they’re expensive anymore. I don’t care like, this is just where they are. And we started really kind of getting more message out. And that’s where things so and I you know, that’s. I feel better and more free and more on fire for life and what I’m doing. Recently I’ve. It’s funny because, like, as I’ve started working on all the things, the gratitude stuff, the realization, the the pulling back from separating yourself from a financial or monetary, materialistic type stuff. You start coming back off of it, you start realizing, realizing how awesome your life really is. I wrote a deal the other day, actually. Remember who posted? I think it was actually, I was a comedian is European. Anyway, and he was talking about how, you know, 50 years or 100 years ago, no one had hot showers. So you look back at Nietzsche, you look back at, you know, who, whoever you know, the philosopher or you know, the person that you admired from 100 years ago was. And that, that guy from a hundred years ago that you admire so much didn’t have harsh hours. As much as you enjoy your love or hate hot showers, I personally love them. That was something that people didn’t have. You know, when we. I jump on Xbox with my kids and play video games and it’s like, you know, life’s pretty. Life’s pretty good. You know, if you can, if you start realizing, practicing gratitude and kind of figuring out, you know, what I’m here to do is acts. I am doing that thing.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:09:38] I’m living that thing I’m pouring into the thing I’m here for. Once you figure out what the purpose is, there’s a way to do that I walk people through, you know? Sure, a little bit, but it’s more of something you’ve got to figure out. Once you can figure out that, hey, I’m here to do a specific thing, and you start doing that thing, you start leaning into it hard and you start recognizing the rest of things are pretty taken care of. And you can start practicing gratitude and start thinking of, hey, here’s the things that are my life that I enjoy and I like. If you start listing them every day, you start thinking about them more often. You start getting this era of things. You’re actually pretty good, and the more you can sit back and think things are actually pretty good. Here’s how I would enhance that. However, things are already pretty good. It changes the way you look at the world. And you can do this all the way up and down the spectrum. You know, it’s, you know, I have a car that actually works. I, you know, I have air conditioning, I have heating, I have running water. I have some type of food to eat. You know. Life’s pretty if life’s not. Not as bad as it could be. Right. And, you know, start thinking of that. Okay. Well, you know, here’s the things I want to do. And here’s the way to get there. That’s aligning with my purpose.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:10:48] It’s a lot easier to do things when you love and enjoy them. I’ve heard people say you should go. You shouldn’t do the thing you love for a job. You should do the thing that makes money. I don’t know if I entirely agree with that. As long as you can survive, there’s a lot of people who are doing the things they love and don’t have fancy cars or big houses who are super happy. And at the end of the day, I know. And here’s the funny thing. And this is why I like to get my my kids to see the whole spectrum of stuff. I know people this there’s a saying it’s a lot better to cry and a Pausch than cry and, you know, on a bicycle, because the Porsche is more comfortable, but you’re still crying, like, that’s that’s the part of that whole thing that I think we’re missing. You’re so crying, like, why don’t you do the things that are going to make you not cry and not worry about being in the Porsche? So, you know, it’s that’s kind of where it is if you’re happy all the day I got. Yeah. We go wherever we go. We travel places, we see people and they don’t have, you know, a lot of the things we have here. And they’re always happy and they’re in a good mood, and life’s great. And you come back here, and these people have, you know, all this access to throw money into to all sorts of great things. And they’re stressed out and they’re in their, life’s rough and, oh, these things are terrible and this and that. And it’s like, if we can change your perspective and kind of work through that. It makes things a lot better. It’s really hard to put any of these.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:12:23] These are long conversations, really hard about any of these into a ten minute thing. So, but that’s kind of where the thing is, if you can sort of figure out, what am I here to do? What am I good at? What do I enjoy doing that’s beneficial to society? If you just start doing more of that as your hobby, you can start doing more of that as find a way to make that find in your life. That would be that would be one of the things that we always try to do is because the stress of I hate what I do, I feel like I’m a slave to whatever it is I’m not. Making progress is who I am as a person. I’m not making progress as you know what I’m doing for society. That’s where we get into that whole like, why am I even here? What? You know, you know, what good am I? That’s the thing. That’s the thing. We can figure out what your purpose is, you know? What are you specifically good at? You know, or maybe you’re not great at a thing. Maybe you’re pretty good at a couple of things that add up to a specific skill set. Then you can do those things. That’s the big thing. So if you can figure it out. And by the way, being a fantastic mom and a fantastic dad is 100% of purpose. You should lean into hard. We don’t have enough good dads. You don’t have enough good moms. Like it’s a big, big deal in the United States right now to tear apart the family unit, the nuclear structure.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:13:38] So if you’re a great mom, lean into that. In fact, if you’re a great mom, teach other people. Like, one of the things we’ve lost is the sense of community. If we can all get together and be like, hey, look, here’s the thing that I did that helped me with my finances. Here’s the thing I did that helped me with, you know, my kids or whatever. You know, if we can get together, start teaching that that would be something that would be very beneficial. And it’s one of those things where you might throw out five things and everyone’s like, yeah, we do four of those five. Well, that fifth thing you threw out that, you know, some of you hadn’t heard before might be something that would be really beneficial because a lot of times it’s, you know, you get a piece of information and that’s like 5% better for your dad. If you get ten of those, your goal is 50% better. But the thing is, we to go find those, and the best way to find them in our busy lives is have somebody else tell you. So, you know, that’s one of those things that if we can get more of that information out, that’s really beneficial. It’s funny because there’s a there’s a, there’s a podcast and there’s a, there’s a social channel. I think it’s called a dumb dads or something like that.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:14:40] There’s two guys who do like they just kind of make they make light of all of the struggles that all the dads go through and like all parents go through, and it’s great because, like, it’s one of those things we’re all kind of, all right, you know, and I think a lot of people want to be better parents, but, you know, it’s one of those deals. But find it, find out what your thing is that you’re good at, and teach it and, you know, go through and help you with it. So that’s one of those things that we can figure out, you know, which are our purposes. It helps tremendously in our stress struggle. So, tomorrow we’re gonna talk about the stuff in front of, we’re going to questions that. So questions that charmers want to talk. Second, you send us an email or drop in the chat comments and we’ll go over that. So thanks for your time.

As always if you have any questions, please send them to Questions@ChalmersWellness.com

Check out Chalmers Pillarsofwellness.com for Wellness updates! And ask me any questions you have at questions@chalmerswellness.com. I answer all of them and look forward to hearing from you.

The Chalmers Wellness Stubstack just launched. Comment, Like, and Interact with other people on their wellness journey. Communities can make a difference.     DrChalmers.substack.com

Dr. Matt Chalmers

Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only. Before taking any action based on this information you should first consult with your physician or health care provider. This information is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health providers with any questions regarding a medical condition, your health, or wellness.

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