08 Aug 2024

A father shares a humorous and insightful story about the unexpected challenges of raising a smart child. After a disagreement with his 11-year-old about proper knife care, the son quickly finds a creative solution by purchasing his own set of inexpensive knives. This quick problem-solving leaves the father both impressed and amused, realizing that his efforts to teach resourcefulness have led to some unforeseen parenting challenges.

Reflecting on the situation, the father discusses the joys and complexities of parenting, especially as children begin to outsmart their parents. He highlights the importance of communication and problem-solving skills, encouraging other parents to share their experiences and advice. Despite the occasional frustration, he emphasizes that raising children is incredibly rewarding and full of fun, even when things don’t go as planned.

Highlights of the Podcast

00:04 – Introduction and Story Setup

01:04 – Son’s Creative Solution

02:28 – Reflection on Parenting

03:50 – Discussion on Parenting Challenges

05:08 – Fun with Parenting and Encouragement

06:27 – Communication with Children

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:00:04] Today is just kind of a fun story about having kids. And kind of a be careful what you wish for type of thing. So when I was making my list of what I wanted in my wife, one of the things I put on I was I wanted her to be smart. And the reason I wanted her to be smarter than me was so that one day when we had kids, we’d have really smart kids. Like, that was that was a goal. I want my kids to be better. And so. Just like to set the stage there. So we, I got into an argument with my 11 year old, about. Why not? I’ve got really nice knives. We’ve had them for a long time. And he was using them, and he put them in the dishwasher. And you don’t put nice knives in the dishwasher because it’s a it’s a water sprays. They clang together there. Everything damages the knives. I was trying to explain that to him, and he was like, I don’t understand. I don’t understand. What you’re saying. You know, he’s being mad at me.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:01:04] So, so we finally I was just like, fine, that’s if you’re not going to, you know, treat my stuff the way I want you to treat, then you’re not going to use it. I was like, you don’t need to use my knives the next two weeks. He was like, how am I supposed to cook? And I was like, well, I said, I guess you’re not it. So that was like, it’s 650 in the morning. I get home at lunch and, he had gone online. He had found knives that he could afford for like $13. And he went up and got them, came up. And so he’s using these knives when I get home. I was like, what do you do? He’s like, I’m cooking with my knives. And I was like, what do you mean? He was like, you said, I couldn’t use your knives. You didn’t say I couldn’t have knives. He was like, so he was like, I got online, I found some I could afford, so I went and got them and I have knives. He was. And the great thing is he was like they were $12. He was like, so if I mess it up, I’ll just throw them away and get your knives. And I was like. Awesome because the whole deal. Apparently, you know, as dad trying to instill in my child was respect for other people and other people’s things and that type of thing. And so he comes up with the most obvious solution to the problem of, you can’t use my knives and solve that. By the time I got home for lunch, like you got it solved in three hours for power went out if I was home at one.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:02:28] So how many hours it is? And so that’s that’s apparently what I get for asking for kids to be smarter than me. But that’s that’s a that’s a fun, fun little, little, little jaunt. And it was funny because when I came home, Daniela, our nanny, thought it was me mad that, you know, I said he couldn’t use knives, and now he has his own knives. Not very, very, very proud of him for for coming up with that solution that quickly. It was I was very impressed. However, now the problem is, is that and I know, I know, I’m throwing this problem. A lot of dads out there have been like, yep. Yeah. Whether it happened at nine or 11 or 15 or whatever, where your kid starts throwing stuff back at you and you’re like, I did not expect you to come up with that type of solution. But yeah, so that’s that’s where we are. But he’s 11 now, right? And so I’ve got to start figuring out how to deal with that level of, of problem solving for as he gets smarter. So yeah, that’s going to be that’s gonna be super fun. But I love the idea that he was able to come up with something that that quickly and that, you know, and it seems so obvious now, like, but the fact he came up with it and he solved it was really, really fun.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:03:50] So, I’m sure lots of you guys out there who have kids have the same type of stories that, you know, even though it was not what I intended, I really, really proud of him for for coming up with that. But that’s kind of one those things that we’ve been, again, we’ve been trying to teach. These are my kids, this type of stuff for the longest time. Like what? Give them problems and like, how would you solve this? And then they would solve it and be like, good job. And so now that I give him problems as punishment and he solves them, I now have to kind of try to come up with new ways of, of doing this. So yeah, but he’s 11 now. And so when I went through puberty, it was between 11 and 13. It’s like which was horrible for everybody around me. And so we have that to deal with. So as someone who has an 11 year old, if you guys have dealt with this and you guys have gone through it, help the rest of us out by giving us some awesome stories of what you guys did and how you guys treated it, because it’s, it’s fun. Like, I’m having a great time. This is by far having kids, by the way. Even the little things like this that are like, oh, that was that kind of backfired on me in a way. It’s still the most fun I’ve ever had.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:05:08] So if you guys are thinking about having kids, you’re hearing all the negative stuff. Like, I realize I’m posting this. I was kind of a, you know, problem type of thing, but it’s awesome, right? You know, yeah, it was kind of irritating. But at the same time, you know, I now know my kid can solve problems like that. 11. So it’s, you know, it’s kind of fun. If you guys had like, us, if you guys have questions, not questions, you guys have anything like that, throw those out. Because I’m sure we’d all like to hear, you know, the fun little things our kids do. It is. It was. It was a fun thing. So. And again, I don’t know what I was expecting when I was teaching these kids how to how to solve problems when they are solving the problems I give them. But it was it was fun. If you guys, when you when you go through and you, you you deal with this other stuff, it’s always it’s always a good self check on where you’re at. So, it’s hard to tell that story. I thought it was fun. It was a cool thing that happened yesterday. And so I’m sure I’m going to have lots of other fun little stories to throw out about my kids, but share some of the ones you guys have. Like if you guys have some of those that you know, as you’re going through what you guys have done with your kids, like how they’ve surprised you or, you know, fun ways where you figured out, like how to better communicate with them. That’d be pretty cool.

Dr. Matt Chalmers [00:06:27] We went through the five web languages for kids with ours, and that was that was really cool. So if you guys haven’t done the five level languages with your kids to figure out how to communicate with them, I would recommend that you guys do that one, because that one was pretty, pretty solid. And the way we’re communicating, but it’s and then this, this, this dad thing is fun. If you guys have any other, any other options or tips or anything like that, like, share them and I’ll put them out. It’d be, kind of fun to kind of get some of those things going. You can drop in the, we have a wellness insights with, Doctor Chalmers, Facebook group. It might have we might change that name to Pillars of Wellness with Doctor Chalmers, but, check it out. Drop your your ideas there. Drop in the comments. It’d be fun to see how you guys are some of the stories you guys have about your kids and how you’ve dealt with them. But yeah, I just thought it was fun. I wanted to share that one. So I’ll talk to you guys later. Thanks for your time.


As always if you have any questions, please send them to Questions@ChalmersWellness.com

Check out Chalmers Pillarsofwellness.com for Wellness updates! And ask me any questions you have at questions@chalmerswellness.com. I answer all of them and look forward to hearing from you.

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Dr. Matt Chalmers

Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only. Before taking any action based on this information you should first consult with your physician or health care provider. This information is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health providers with any questions regarding a medical condition, your health, or wellness

 

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